Kelvin Ho is a wedding officiant who was born and raised on the island of Oahu. He has been living on Kaua`i since 1979, and has been performing weddings and ceremonies of passage since 1986.
Aloha pumehana- “the love of warmth” I would like to begin with offering gratitude. In order to feel grounded and balanced in this new beginning, I recognize the importance of first looking towards the many teachers and life’s experiences whose guidance have shaped us and these vessels of service. This site is created as a response to have more of a web presence and to offer a way to connect with our global community. The service and content offered here center around passages of the heart so it is natural to begin with gratitude. I’ve found time and again that when our hearts open to the authenticity of the present in ritual, what arises and saturates the moment is thankfulness. So mahalo, obrigado, arigato, gracias, and thank you to all our teachers and the oneness within all.
Approach to the ritual of marriage
Seen as a ceremony of passage, unique in life from other passages of achievement or acquiring as one that you make with your beloved. We base the ceremony on a firm spiritual foundation of your gratitude. For family, loved ones, teachers and guides. We recognize you are joining your lineages with your love. That you have already surrendered to Love’s sacred presence and joined together at the deepest place of your hearts and being. The ceremony and rituals are designed to express this truth and embody it in the world of form. Together we draw on what is most meaningful to you to bring this to the light of day for yourselves, families, friends and community. As you move through the moments of this passage you are immersed and enfolded in the loving support and best wishes of those you most care about. Your love living vibrantly in the consecrated space of your relationship becomes your new center of balance and the source of your paths of service here on earth. We seal these vows you create together and the peak vision of the passage into a place of remembrance that you can access at any time for guidance and navigation in your journey through life together.
As with any great transformational passage, preparation is a vital aspect of the process. Preparing well looks clearly and deeply at what is changing, what needs to be released and left behind and how best to ready the place and space with reverence. In ceremonies of union, I believe that the love you share is a truth that is remembered and recognized as your natural state of being and not some state of achievement. It may take us a long and challenging path to get to this place in life but when we do, somehow we recognize it as returning home in our hearts. There is an ease that pervades the spiritual union as your life foundation. To rest in love is to rest in God. All the preparation, planning, settings and rituals set the stage for your “truth” to be expressed in the world of form. Those who have looked deeply and fearlessly into their hearts and lives together have taken the first step. Knowing that the unknown and unlimited potential wait beyond this passage, you simply trust wholeheartedly in your love. You have surrendered to this sacred sense of presence that you nurture and cultivate together. Only love’s healing presence can undo the past in you and thus transform your state of consciousness. We recognize this presence as forgiveness and if you choose in ceremony, with a ritual hand washing. First washing ones own hands to express a coming to this union with complete forgiveness, first for oneself, blessing the past free with the recognition that all you have grown through was needed to bring you here with the depth, compassion and understanding that is yours. Then washing each other’s hands to promise to find forgiveness in your hearts for one another. The highest form of forgiveness doesn’t overlook, it looks “through” to your truth. We base this hand washing in the cultural practice of “hi’uwai, kapu kai, and kapu wai”, washing your physical forms and spirits from a clean and pure source of water with focused intention. To release what doesn’t serve this love you are aligning with. Can this truth be put into words? Yes, but the words, ritual and ceremony are not the truth. They can only point to or serve as exquisite vessels to contain this truth. The “kuleana” or sacred responsibility of preparation, rest on you. What your hearts, lives and families bring to this pinnacle of passage is the essence that flows through these vessels into the world of form to best express your love divine.
We begin and end with awareness brought to our breath. In Hawaiian spiritual practice as well as countless other paths, in our daily walks one’s breath is recognized as our closest link to spirit divine. In ceremonies of union we begin by bringing our attention back to the breath to calm the “largeness” of the moment. To get the butterflies to fly in formation and lift us all. We use this vehicle to center ourselves and to ground the ceremony to this wondrous place with remembrance. The breath or “Ha” in Hawaiian is recognized as sacred and bridging ones essence with the natural and spiritual world. As the union between two souls is perceived as spiritual on it deepest level, after the vows we close the ceremony with a ritual of Ha. We believe that the deepening into one life and this new way of being begins with deepening into your shared breath. A lei is draped over your left hands held together. You are asked to bring your foreheads to touch, close your eyes and to relax and rest there, breathing into one another’s breath. We acknowledge that your breath contains the breath of your ancestors and those that are coming to follow in your footsteps. That your paths of service here on earth spring from the foundation of your love and union. You are asked to feel the unification of your hearts, vision and intention. I will walk around you sprinkling pa’akai- traditionally made sea salt and offer this blessing…
Ho’okahi naau, Ho’okahi mana o’lana,
Ho’okahi malamalama, Ho’okahi ‘oiai’o,
Ho’okahi ola, Ho’okahi ‘oli ‘oli,
E kahe pu ana, e ulu pu ana,
Mai ke kumu ho’okahi mai.
One heart, One hope,
One light, One truth,
One life, One joy,
Flowing together, growing together,
From a single source.
You are asked to create a place of deep remembrance of this peak moment of your love within this shared breath. This enables you to access all the vision, support and all that is beyond words from this ceremony at any time in your lives together. It is now never further away than your shared breath.
You then open your eyes to awaken to your new life and turn to face your new life together.